Friday, October 17, 2008

How old are you in survivor years?

I am preparing to participate in a few things over the next two weeks: participating on the 22nd in an Ohio for Obama cancer forum at OSU (not shure where yet!!) with sister-survivor Cynthia Nixon (yes - of Sex and the City!); appearing the next day on Gail Hogan's Columbus Daytime show to discuss breast cancer in young women; and then the following week traveling to Meigs County to do a presentation on intimacy after breast cancer.
As part of these talks, and in my bio, I always say that I am X number of years out. I find it fascinating how I (and many other survivors) tend to regress in maturity when it comes to telling our survivor years. My 'cancerversarry' is April 12th, 2001. So I am almost 8 years out. 7 years and 8 months to be exact. I would never say I am 7 years out now that I am so close to 8 years. I am 39 years old (ack!). But I would NEVER say I am 'almost 40' or 39 years and 7 months. Hells to the no!! I cling to that younger number with a viciousness found only in wild tigers! By the same token (or opposite token), I reach towards the "almost 8 years out" verbiage with vigor! I know, in my heart, that it doesn't really matter. That I could be 20 years out (my lips to God's ears!) and be diagnosed with a new breast cancer, or a metastic lesion...or worse. I know that in reality the further I get away from my original diagnosis I am not moving closer to a cure. Rather it is more likely that I am moving closer to my next diagnosis.

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